I received the letter to attend the breast clinic on my return from hospital after my surgery to remove my ectopic pregnancy.
The appointment was for 4 days later.
The next day I called the clinic and told the lady I wished to cancel, I explained about the operation and also that I felt that probably the lumps were pregnancy related. I felt that once the pregnancy hormones subsided then the lumps would (hopefully) disappear.
She said that I should still attend the appointment to get it checked, but still I felt like it would still be a waste of everyone’s time. Also I felt weak and drained from losing the pregnancy and emotionally dead.
I probably wouldn’t have cared much if my head had fallen off at the time.
I told her to go ahead and cancel the appointment as I wanted the appointment to be available for someone who needed it more.
The day after the appointment the breast clinic rang.
‘You missed your appointment yesterday,’ she said, ‘we would like you to make another one.’
I explained that I had made sure I had cancelled the appointment as I wanted to make sure that the appointment time could be made available for someone else to make use of.
‘Ok,’ she said. The message hadn’t got through to the right department.
‘Please make an appointment to see your doctor.’ She said.
A few days later the doctor rang.
‘Please make an appointment to come and see me.’
At the appointment the doctor said how sorry she was to hear how the pregnancy ended.
‘I didn’t expect that.’ She said.
‘I did,’ I said, ‘but no one would listen to me.’
‘Yes,’ she said, ‘you said something was wrong didn’t you.’
She gave me a breast examination.
‘All clear.’ She said, ‘no need for referral.’
‘That’s great.’ I said.
‘Are you feeling ok with everything?’ she says.
‘No,’ I said, ‘I feel completely crap.’
‘I’d be very happy to give you a sick note for a while.’
‘No thanks, I have to work. I’m self-employed and a sick note won’t cut it.’
A week later I miss a call and am freaked out completely when a message is left on the answerphone from the doctor’s surgery asking me to call.
‘The doctor would like you to make an appointment to come and see her.’
‘Why?’ I say when I phone them back, ‘I only saw her last week.’
‘Oh,’ she says, ‘for a breast examination.’
‘Another one?’ I say, ‘I only had one last week!’
‘Oh did you,’ she says, ‘let me have a look. Oh yes no problem then.’